Adventures in Pizza Land…. Part II

Many years ago I worked in a pizza parlor, mainly as a delivery person, but when deliveries were slow I also did what I could behind the counter. Whether that was waiting on customers, cutting up stock, cleaning or what have you. That being said this is a stream of adventures and or mis-adventures in that said land.

One time I was on a delivery and it was one of the first ones the evening. One thing that always pissed me off was the first or second delivery the customer would have a large bill and either it took all your change or you didn’t have enough money to even make change. Well this time I didn’t have enough. The man and his wife were pretty regular customers, older folks who he made a living as a painter, or a drunk, as that was the way I always saw him. And he told some of the filthiest jokes one can imagine. He used to stand in the store in front of customers and employees, drunk as all hell, and tell some of the most off color stuff you ever heard. Anyway this time I was at his house with no change for the bill he had. He always had tons of cash, at least from what I saw. No problem he exclaimed and off to the corner store he went, leaving me standing there with his wife. I glanced around the house, which had a funny dirty smell but everything looked pretty clean and new?!? All I remember of her was she was an older lady, in a house coat and didn’t say two words to me the whole time. I had the feeling she pretty much stayed in that house coat. Funny thing was we were standing in the doorway and she was kind of in my space if you know what I mean. I stood there my eyes darting around when for whatever reason I looked down and holy cow! She had toe nails that must have been six inches long. No joke. Six inches! She could probably sit on the limb of a tree and her grip with them would keep her there all day. It was a sight for sure but I think I did a good job of containing the momentary shock of seeing them.  Six inches…

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