Monthly Archives: December 2011

Christmas Toys That Were Christmas Toys….

Back when times were simpler some of the toys below were coveted by Santa’s worst customers, so I heard.  I can’t remember the last time I saw any of the below at Christmas time, or for that matter, at all, or ever.  I don’t even see them in stores, do they still sell these?  We didn’t need an “X Box” or bullcrap, our minds were challenged by our own imagination, not a computer simulator.  I remember these, do you?

Lincoln Logs are somewhat challenging, somewhat, but the great thing about them is they go together so neatly.  The bad part is that if you build something and decide to add something else to your creation you pretty much have to take apart the whole thing and start again.  Ofcourse back then it was not a traumatic event for a child like it would be today.  Also it seemed like I never had enough pieces to complete what I started.  Something else today’s child would need therapy to get over.


“Erector Set”

The Erector set was for the smarter set, which I guess would explain why I never had one.  Quite honestly I really can’t even remember ever playing with one.  No smart friends either I suppose.  This was like for kids that had engineering in their future, or their present.  The  projects took a bit of time to put together and at the same time were a bit cumbersome, nuts, bolts, gears and the like.  I bet a lot of Dads just bought one for themselves under the guise that it was for the boy.  I bet.


“Etch O Sketch”

Ahh the Etch-O-Sketch.  It was a magical box that drew pictures with the turn of a couple knobs.  I don’t think out of all the times I picked one of these up I ever drew anything that was worth a crap.  I one time tried to clear the entire screen off and see what was inside and how it worked but as soon as I could see inside somewhat that ended that experiment.  Hand eye coordination and patients were the secret.  And remember, a circle is damn near impossible.


“Walkie Talkies”

Holy cow walkie talkies!  You could talk to your buddies that were out of sight.  Of course you could never think of anything to say except “can you hear me” over and over.  And static, holy smokes you can’t imagine!  I guess these were the pre-curser to the cell phone, except most kids went outside to play and use them, which is something we don’t do today.  The instructions always said ” for use up to a 1/4 mile” hell mine wouldn’t pick up down to the corner.  But it was fun trying.  I still got em.


"Hockey Set"

 God my brother loved this.  He bothered the crap out of me whenever he was around to play hockey.  Of course he was much older, loved hockey and beating me was double time fun for him.  This was true hand eye coordination along with a bit of strategy.  Now a days kids would no longer play hockey on a set like this than go outside and play.  Hockey now is probably played with a joy stick from a laid back position on the couch against a computer, not a live brother.


"Schwinn Sting Ray"

The was the coop-da-gracie of gifts.  Never had one, probably only rode one or two ever, but was always in awe when up close to one.  It was like being next to an idol.  This was for the well off kids, which I was not.  This bike was about the coolest thing going.  Big ole stick shifter, five speeds, shock absorbers.  Hell what’s not to love?  They all had cool names as well.  The orange bike was the “Orange Krate”, the yellow bike was the “Lemon Krate”, red bike was the “Apple Krate” etc etc etc.  It always seemed like those who had them didn’t appreciate what they had and that pissed me off all the more.  If you didn’t have a Schwinn you didn’t have crap, everything else was an also ran.  I had an also ran.

I Call Em Like I See Em….

"Video Deer Hunting, Only This is Easier"

Come on let’s call it like it is.  I have many friends who are so called deer hunters.  Actually they sit in a tree and shoot deer from there without so much as taking a step toward actually hunting anything.  Yes this is called hunting.  During the season of preparation leading up to hunting season they talk of tree stands and corn piles.  The uneducated may wonder what those thing have to do with hunting.  Well here is how it goes.  A couple months before the season starts you start putting out corn  in piles for the deer to come and eat.  I guess it serves two purposes.  Fattens them up for one thing, and well you know where they’ll be when the killin begins.  Let’s see, sitting in a tree waiting for the prey to come and eat the bait you have been setting out for a couple months then you blow his brains out.  Hunting?  That sounds about right.  Although I think maybe AMBUSH is a better term but I can’t get one hunter to agree with me.  I had one guy tell me he shot a deer and it fell into the corn pile.  You ever been on an Easter egg hunt?  You don’t sit in the bushes and wait for the eggs to come to you.  Hunters put on this green garb to camouflage themselves.  What for?  Their sitting in a tree for crying out loud.  Shouldn’t the garb be brown and look like limbs and bark?  The green would stick out in a brown tree it would seem to me.  Now remember the egg hunt?  If the eggs won’t come to you, you might have to coax them a bit.  They text one of their 20 buddies they have surrounding the land to send in the dogs to flush them out.  Dogs you ask.  Why dogs?  Cause your ass ain’t moving from that tree.  Your hunting don’t you know!  You wouldn’t want to actually step foot on the ground would you.  I thought not.  They love this.  They thinks it’s a challenge.  I believe the biggest challenge is sitting quietly, that’s always stressed in the deer killin stories.  How quiet they were before they blew the deer away.  I’ve never tried it but I have scared people by hiding behind something quietly and then jumping out when they are not expecting it.  Same thing right?  I have been offered more deer meat than you can shake a tree stand at, hell they can’t wait to give it away so they can go back and HUNT some more.  “Let me know if you want me to kill one for you” they ask.  Your kidding me right?  I tell them to call me when they kill a cow.  No calls yet.  After the kill, they drag poor Rudolph with a four wheeler back to a huge 4×4 pickup, pack up their high powered rifle with a night vision scope, clean themselves off of the deer urine they sprayed on, take 27 pictures from every possible angle, and then boast of another successful hunt.  I guess if I went through that much crap I’d boast too.  I guess my last questions is, exactly how do they get deer to urinate into spray bottles?  Gun point I bet!

Seven Year Itch, Ten Win Season….

"The Ship Has Been Righted"!

My God it’s finally over.  Well two things actually.  Michigan (10-2) finally beat Ohio State (6-6) 40-34 to end a severe seven year long losing streak, and a Michigan defense that had fallen by the wayside as far as being any kind of effective was back.  It is hard to believe that this is the first Michigan victory over OSU since 2003.  Really, 2003!!!  Ten wins makes it that much better, no one, I repeat, no one, saw a 10 win season coming!  Denard Robinson played lights out!  The game was close throughout with Michigan hanging on to a small lead for most of it and truthfully three plays kept OSU in it.  Two long TD passes which we never gave up during the year and a dropped punt snap, but then again crap happens I guess.  But the defense came alive and got better each week.  The interception at the end was so perfect, pure excitement.  This defense that was ranked 108th in scoring and 110th in total last year is now ranked 8th in scoring and 14th in total.  How do you turn it around so fast.  How can a defensive coach be so inept.  It’s the same players for the most part.  Looking back over the RichRod years why did he keep Gerg around???  I expected the turnaround to be 2-3 years and truth be known there is still a lot to do.  The schedule this year was very favorable.  Regardless OSU came to play and really played their best game all season, they were 6-5 coming in and 6-6 going out.  Great way to end the regular season.  After Nebraska last week and OSU this week how in the hell did we lose to Iowa with this team?

Check this out!

All Good Things Come To An End….

Well it was inevitable wasn’t it.  They looked at times too good.  Really.  Too good. 

But stop, first things first.  The passing of team member Jake David seemed to light a fire under the team and they wanted to do him proud but fell a bit short.  Jake was killed in a car accident early Wednesday morning.  Before the evening started stadium announcer LT asked for a moment of silence for Jake and believe me it was so quiet that you could hear your heartbeat.  Not even a childs cry.  Jake’s jersey was worn by his best friend that night during the game.

A team we had beated four years straight came to play, they weren’t great but they kept us from doing what we wanted to do.  Despite the breaks going our way for most of the evening we still couldn’t get over the hump.  I believed that when we had them late on a 4th and 27 we’d hold, run out the clock and stagger into the championship game once again.  It didn’t happen and we didn’t move on.  I tried as the season progressed to say “if we” “if we” but I drank the Kool Aid along with everyone else and thought “when we”.  I take nothing away from Timberland, they never quit and straight up made the plays when they needed to beating us 18-15.

I said after last week’s game that this one scared me, not because they were Timberland, who took care of business like we did during the season, but because we lost a step once the playoffs hit.  I can’t explain it but something went south for us in November.

There’s always next year, see ya on the sidelines.